Thursday, January 31, 2008 10:29 PM
for the whole day today i m tinking whether should i carry on gng down to CBSS for all their NPCC training... i m tinking it hav been 3 years or more since i had become a CI le... i m wondering myself... m i actually fit to be a CI...? i can confidently tel u tat when i m a NCO i hav alot of confident in myself but since i become a CI...??? i don tink so... as wat zhi hui said to mi yesterday... don play with the cadets... i m alway tinking how i m suppose to let the cadet respect mi and not be scare of mi... i did it in not letting them scare of mi... but in respecting mi... i tink i m a total failure... i noe there are a few NCO who is not happy with mi... come on la.. if not happy juz come to mi directly la.. don go pass it around lor... AQUA ar... 16 years old this year liao stil hav small kid tinking... anyway don wanna tok abt this le...
the question of whethershould i carry on gng down for training stil hovering in my mind... haiz... certainly it a difficult decision for mi to make but i tink for the benefit for the cadet i hav to stop gng down and DISTURB them.... definitely came bear to leave them but... donno how to explain exactly oso... juz felt tat i m not fit to be a CI anymore le... time is up... and i m really old le..
sth for jason... abt the camp coor thing maybe i hav to disappoint u... i need to hav a clear mindto tink now... sry... tml fri parade again... might be gng down after work... but not confirm will be tinking abt it... tink i cant get to slp tonight le.. haiz...
and for the CCU team if u all happen to see this post which i hope u wont... i m not giving up on u all definitely i m juz giving up on myself... sometime i felt tat is not tat u all cant do it la... it only the matter whether u all wan to do it anot only... so don give up on yourself... if... i mean if... i really decided not to go for ur training i will stil be supporting u all my spirit will alay be there ok...??? CCU team jia you... with jason and zhihui sir with u all i believe and trust them tat they can bring u all to a new height... remember one thing no one will be able to give up u all unless u all give up urself... bear this in mind ar... lastly SORRY CCU team...
one more person i wanna say sry to is C*****K**... i tink i make a harsh decision la... but i don tink i will regret it... wish u all the best... take care...
Labels: SHOULD I STOP WATEVER I M DOING???? I DONNO..
I M OFFICIALLY KNOWN AS EMO KID !!!
